Gordon Dickson Act Of Creation


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"Adam, come here," I ordered
Gordy is perhaps best known for the group of stories and novels involving
Dorsai  the world which produces as its only export the finest mercenary
soldiers in known space. (The Hugo-winning
"Soldier, Ask Not" is part of this cycle, which is itself only a part of a
much larger scheme Gordy calls the Childe Cycle. Ultimately this should
involve historical novels, mainstream novels, and possibly a series of
concertos for the kazoo  if I recall correctly.) The Dorsai are among the
most memorable characters in sf, dark and somber and inflexibly honorable to a
man; not (as Gordy has said) men of the military, but men of war. The
following story is the only representation of the Dorsai Saga in this
collection  and a strikingly atypical one (well, the typical ones are already
heavily anthologized). It is also one of my personal favorites.
History says that very often it is the people who do the most for their race
that suffer most greatly: Prometheus, Moses, and a Nazarene carpenter come to
mind. But the Law of Karma insists that the books always balance in the end 
that inherent in every destruction is an . . .
ACT OF CREATION
Now that I have had time to think it over, the quite commonsense explanation
occurs to me that old Jonas Wellman must have added an extra, peculiar circuit
to cause the one unusual response. He was quite capable of it, of course 
technically, that is. And I don't know but what he was equally capable of it
psychologically. Nevertheless, at the time, the whole thing shook me up badly.
I had gone up to see him on a traditionally unpleasant duty. His son, Alvin,
had been in my outfit at the time of Flander's Charge, off the Vegan
Warhold. The boy was liaison officer from the Earth Draft, and he went with
the aft gun platform, the Communications Dorsai Regulars, when we got
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"Adam, come here," I ordered pinched between a light cruiser and one of those
rearmed freighters the
Vegans filled their assault line with.
The cruiser stood off at a little under a thousand kilometers and boxed us
with her light guns. While we were occupied, the freighter came up out of the
sun and hit us with a CO beam, before we caught her in our laterals and blew
her to bits. It was their CO beam that did it for Alvin and the rest.
At any rate, Alvin had been on loan to us, so to speak, and, as commanding
officer, I owed a duty-call to his surviving relatives. At that time, I hadn't
connected his last name  Wellman  with Jonas Wellman. Even if I had, I
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would have had to think a long minute before remembering just who Jonas
Wellman was.
Most people using robots nowadays never heard of him. Of course, I had,
because we Dorsai mercenaries were the first to use them in combat.
When I did make the connection, I remember it struck me as rather odd, because
I had never heard Alvin mention his father.
I had duty time-off after that  and, since we were in First Quadrant area, I
shuttled to Arcturus and took the short hop to Sol. I had never been on the
home world before and I was rather interested to see what Earth looked like.
As usual, with such things, it was somewhat of a disappointment. It's a small
world, anyway, and, since it lost its standing as a commercial power, a lot of
the old city areas have been grubbed up and turned into residential districts.
In fact, the planet is hardly more than one vast suburb, nowadays. I was told
that there's a movement under way to restore some of the old districts as
historical shrines, but they'd need Outsystem funds for that, and I can't,
myself, see many of the large powers sparing an appropriation at the present
time.
Still, there's something about the planet. You can't forget that this was
where we all started. I landed in the South Pacific, and took a commuter's
rocket to the Mojave. From there, I put in a call to Jonas Wellman, who lived
someplace north and west of the mountain, range there  I forget the name of
it. He was pleased to hear from me, and invited me up immediately.
I located one of these little automatic taxi-ships, and we puttered north by
northwest for about half an hour and finally set down in a small parking area
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"Adam, come here," I ordered in the Oregon woods. There was nothing there but
the glassy rectangle of the area itself, plus an automatic call station for
the taxis. A few people were waiting around for their ships to arrive, and, as
I sat down, what looked like an A-5 robot came across the field to meet me.
When he got close, I saw he wasn't an A-5, but something similar 
possibly something a bit special that Jonas had designed for himself.
"Commandant Jiel?" he asked.
"That's right," I said.
I followed him across the parking area, toward a private hopper. The few
people we passed on the way turned their backs as we passed, with a
deliberateness and uniformity that was too pointed to be accidental.
For a moment, it occurred to me that I might be the cause of their reaction 
certain creeds and certain peoples, who have experienced wars, have no use for
the mercenary soldier.
But this was the home world nobody would think of attacking, even if they had
a reason for doing so, which, of course, Earth will never be able to give
them, as long as the large powers exist.
Belatedly, it occurred to me that the robot with me might be the cause. I
turned to look at him. An A-5  particularly an A-5  is built to resemble the
human form. This was, as I have said, a refined model. I mulled the matter
over, trying to phrase the question, so I could get information out of the
mechanical.
"Are there Anti-R's in the community here?" I asked finally.
"Yes, sir," he said.
Well, that explained it. The AR's are, in general, folk with an unpleasant
emotional reaction to robots. They are psychopathic in my opinion and in that
of any man who has used robots commercially or for military purposes.
They find robots resembling the human form  particularly the A-5 model and
the rest of the A-series 
obscene, disgusting
, and so forth. Some worlds which have experienced wars are almost completely
AR.
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I didn't, however, expect to find it on Earth, especially so close to the home
of Jonas Wellman. Still, a prophet in his own country, or however the old
saying goes.
We took a ground car, which the robot drove, and, eventually, reached a
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"Adam, come here," I ordered curious anachronism of a house, set off in the
woods by itself. It was a long, rambling structure, made in frame of native
stone and wood, the only civilized thing about it being vibratory
weather-screens between the pillars of the frame, to keep out the rain and
wind.
It had a strange aura about it, as if it were a dwelling place, old not so
much in years as in memories, as if something about it went back to the very
dawn of the race. The rain and the falling night, as we approached it,
heightened this illusion so that the tall pines, clustered closely about house
and lawn, seemed almost primeval, seemed to enclose us in an ancestral past.
Yet, the house itself was cheerful. It's lighting was inlaid in the archaic
framing, and it glowed internally, with a subdued, casual illumination that
did not dim the flames in a wide, central fireplace. Real flames from actual
burning wood  not an illusion! It touched me, somehow. Few people, unless
they have seen the real article, appreciate the difference between the actual
flames of a real fire, and those of an illusion.
I, who have experienced the reality, on strange planets, of a need for warmth
and light, know the difference very well. It is a subjective reaction, not
easily put into words. Perhaps, if you will forgive my straining to be
fanciful, who am not a fanciful man, it's this  there are stories in the real
flames. I know it can mean nothing to those of you who have never seen it but
 try it for yourself, sometime.
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
Illustration by RICK BRYANT
Jonas Wellman, himself, came forward to meet me, when we stepped through the
front screen lens. He was a short, slim man, a little bent about the
shoulders, who had let his hair go completely white. He had a gnome's face,
all wrinkled, sad and merry in the same instant. He came forward and held out
his hand.
"Commandant Jiel," he said.
His voice was as warm as the hissing flames of his fireplace. I took his hand
without hesitation, for I am no hater of old traditions.
"Good of you to come," he said. "Sorry about the rain. The district requires
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"Adam, come here," I ordered it for our trees, and we like our trees around
here."
He turned and led the way to a little conversation-area. The robot glided on
silent feet behind us, towering over both of us. Though I have the hereditary
Dorsai height, the A-5 run to a two-and-a-quarter-meter length, which is
possibly one of the reasons the AR dislike them so.
"Sit down, Commandant, sit down, please," Jonas said. "Adam, would you bring
us some drinks, please? What would you like, Commandant?"
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"Plain ethyl and water, thanks," I said. "It's what we get used to on duty."
He smiled at me in the light of the fire, which was dancing to our right and
throwing ruddy lights on his time-marked face.
"Whatever is your pleasure," he said.
The robot brought the glasses. Jonas was drinking something also colorless. I
remember I meant to ask him what it was, but never got around to doing so.
Instead, I asked him about the robot.
"Adam?" I said. Jonas chuckled.
"He was to be the first of a new series," he answered.
"I didn't mean that," I said. "I meant your naming him at all. Very few people
do, nowadays."
"The vogue has passed," he said. "But I've had him for a long time, and I
live alone here." The last words reminded us both of my errand, and he stopped
rather abruptly. He hurried back into conversation, to bridge the gap. "I
suppose you know about my connection with robotics and robots?"
"We used them on Kemelman for land scouts, first, eighty years or so back."
"That's right," he said, his gnome's face saddening a little. "I'd forgotten."
"They were very successful."
"I suppose they were  militarily." He looked squarely at me, suddenly. "No
offense to you Dorsai, Commandant, but I was not in favor of military use of
my robots. Only  the decision was taken out of my hands. I lost control of
the manufacturing and licensing rights early."
"No offense," I said, but I looked at him curiously. "I didn't know that."
"Oh, yes," he said. "It was a little too big for one man, anyway. First the
Earth Council grabbed it, then the Solar Commission. Then it went out in all
directions, with every system grabbing a chunk and setting up their own
manufactories and regulators."
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
"I'm sorry to hear that," I said.
"Don't be." He shook his head, sticking out his lower lip like someone
deprecating something already so small as to be beneath notice. "It was
probably inevitable. Then, I think my robots have done more harm than good in
the long run, no matter what's been accomplished with them." He shook his head
again, smiling. "Not that I was always so resigned to the situation."
"No?"
"No  I had my dreams, when I was younger. To build a better universe, to
better people  I was an idealist."
"An idealist?" I repeated. "I don't know the word."
"It's an old one," he answered. "Almost lost its meaning, now. It means 
well, that you have a very high opinion of the human race, or people. That you
expect the best of them, and want the best for them."
I laughed. "It sounds like being in love with everyone at once."
He nodded, smiling.
"Something like that, Commandant  perhaps not so violent. Tone it down a
little and call it being fond of people. I'm a fond sort of person, I suppose.
I've been fond of a great many things. Of people, of my robots, of my first
wife, of . . ." His voice trailed off and he looked into the firelight. He
sighed.
"Perhaps," he added, "you'd better tell me about my son, now, Commandant."
I told him briefly. It is always best that way. Make it like a news report,
impersonal, then sit back for the questions. There are always the questions.
Jonas Wellman was no different. He sat a little longer than most, after I had
finished, staring into the fire, but he came to it at last.
"Commandant," he said, "what did you think of Alvin?"
"Why," I told him, "I didn't know him too well, you know. He was liaison
officer from another outfit  almost a visitor aboard our ship. We had
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different customs, and he kept pretty much to himself." I stopped, but when
I saw him still waiting, I had to go on. "He was very quiet, a good sort of
officer, not self-conscious with us Dorsai, the way a lot of outsiders are . .
."
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
I talked on, trying to bring my memory of Alvin Wellman back into focus, but
it was not too good. You try to remember the best on these occasions, to
forget the worst. The truth was, there was very little to remember. Young
Wellman had been like a ghost among us. The only clear memory I could bring to
mind was of his sitting back in his corner of the table at mess, his pale
young features withdrawn from the place and the technical conversation that
went on among the rest of us.
"He was a good man," I wound up finally. "We all liked him."
"Yes." The old man lifted his face from the flames. "He was drafted, you
know."
"Oh?" I said  although, of course, I had known it perfectly well. It was why
we had called the Solar Contingent the Earth Draft among ourselves. None of
them had any real stake in the war, and few had wanted to come. It was
Arcturus' doing, as everybody knew. The home system is under Arcturus'
thumb, and probably always will be. But you don't tell that to an old man who
has lost his only son in a war resulting from such a situation.
"His mother never wanted him to go  but there was no choice." Jonas picked up
his drink, sipped it, as an old man will, then put it down again. But his
voice was a little stronger when he went on.
"His mother was my second wife, you know. We separated when Alvin was six.
That was  that was . . ." His voice took on a fretful note. For the first
time a true note of his age rang through it. "When was that, Adam?"
"Eighteen years ago,"' said the robot suddenly, startling me. I had almost
forgotten that he was still with us. His voice, coming unexpectedly out of the
fire-cast shadows behind us, made me start.
"Oh, yes  yes. Eighteen years ago," said Jonas, with a sigh of pleasure and
relief. He looked over at me with something that was almost like shyness.
"Adam is my memory," he said. "Everything that I forget, he remembers 
everything! Tell the Commandant what the house was like, then, Adam."
"It was as it is now," said the robot. "The lawn was the same, except that we
had a bed of roses along the south edge."
"Ah, yes  those roses," said Jonas, nodding. "Alvin was very fond of those
roses. Even as a baby  even when he stuck himself with the thorns."
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
"Did they have thorns?" I asked, surprised.
"Yes," he answered. "Yes, indeed. I'm very old-fashioned in some ways,
Commandant, as you can tell by this house. Something in me has always yearned
toward the past. That's why I like it here, with the trees all around me and
the mountains standing over and behind them, unchanging, year after year."
"And you were the man who came up with the first practical humanoid robots," I
said.
"Why should that surprise you?" He looked at me almost wonderingly. "I
didn't intend them to lead us farther away from old virtues, but back to them
again."
I shook my head. "I don't see how," I said.
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"Why, I wanted to set people free," he said. "I wanted to unite their hands,
and their minds. The average man is essentially good, Commandant. A
hundred and forty years of life have never changed my mind about that. He
wants to be fond of his fellowman and will, given half a chance."
I shook my head again, but without saying anything. I did not want to argue
with him.
"Love is life," he said, "and life is love. All the accidents in the world
can't prove that false. Did the accident that took my first wife's life prove
that I
didn't love her when she was alive? Did the accidental combination of
political powers that took my robots from me negate the love for people that
caused me to create those robots in the first place?
"Did the accident that my second wife never really loved me deny the life that
was given to Alvin, or my love for him, or his for me  before she took him
away? I tell you, he loved me as a baby  didn't he, Adam?"
"He loved you, Jason."
"And I was very fond of him. I was already an old man then. I didn't remarry
for many, many years, after my first  my Elaine  died. I thought I would
never marry again. But then she came along  and she gave me Alvin. But then
she took him away again, for no good reason, except that she knew I
was fond of him, and wanted him. She was very bitter against me for not having
what she believed I had when she married me." He paused.
"Money," said the robot quietly.
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
"Yes, money. She thought I still controlled some part of the robot franchise,
here in the system, that no one knew about. She was too cautious, too clever,
to check fully before she married me. After we were married, it was too late.
"She tried to make a go of it, though, which is much more than another woman
might have done in her place. She gave me Alvin. But she had never really
liked me, and her dislike grew worse and worse, until she couldn't stand it.
So she left me, and took him."
He stopped. The fire flickered on the pillars of the house.
"That's too bad," I said awkwardly. "It  is she still alive?
"No." He said it abruptly. "She died shortly after AIvin was drafted. I went
to see her, but she wouldn't see me. And so, she died. It was then I learned
that Alvin was gone. She hadn't told me about the draft."
"I see," I said.
"I was fond of her, too  still," he went on. "But it hurt me that I had not
been able to see my son, before he went off to die, so many millions and
millions of miles away. If she had left him with me as a boy, I would have
taught him to love people, to love everything as I myself have. Perhaps he
would have been a success, where I have been a failure." He flung up his head
and turned suddenly to the robot.
"Adam, I've been a failure!" he cried.
"No," said the robot.
The old man heaved a heavy sigh. Slowly, the tension leaked out of him, and he
slumped back in his chair. His eyes were abstracted, and on the fire.
"No," I said. "In my opinion, you're no failure, Mr. Wellman. You have to
judge success or failure by concrete things. You set out to give robots to
people, and you did. That's the one big accomplishment of your life."
"No." He shook his head, his eyes still locked in the heart of the fire. "Love
is life. Love should create life to some good, purposeful end. I poured out my
love, and all I created came to a dead end. Not the theory, but I fell down. I
have Adam tell me that I didn't but this is the sort of soothing syrup an old
man feeds himself. Well . . ."
He roused himself. He looked at me and I was surprised at the change in
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Wellman's face. The sad and merry lines were all fallen into the still mask of
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"Adam, come here," I ordered great age. It was a face which sees at once the
empty future and the lid of the coffin closing soon upon it.
"I get tired quickly nowadays," he said. "If you'll forgive me, Commandant,
I'll have Adam take you back to the taxi-area. Thank you for coming this long
distance to tell me about Alvin."
He held out his hand. I took it briefly, and stood up. "It's nothing," I said.
"We mercenaries spend our lives in moving from one place to another. I
was close as star-distances go. Good-by, Mr. Wellman."
He looked up at me from the depths of his chair. "One thing, Commandant,"
he said. "Just one more thing  were people fond  did the men on your ship
really like
Alvin?"
"Why . . ." I said, fumbling, for the truth was that none of us had known the
young man well enough to like or dislike him  and the question had caught me
off balance. "Why  they liked him well enough."
The old man sagged. "Yes," he said. His downcast eyes, as if drawn by some
force greater than the life within him, wandered back to the fire. "Well,
thank you again, Commandant."
"It was nothing. Good-by," I said.
I offered my hand again, but he did not see it. He was seated staring into the
flames, seeing something could not imagine. I left him that way.
Outside, the robot opened the door of the ground car for me and slid behind
the controls himself. The rain had stopped falling, but the night was heavy
and dark. We moved silently down the road, man and mechanical, behind a little
yellow pool of light dancing before us from the headlights.
For some time, I sat without saying anything, thinking to myself of odd things
the old man's words had somehow conjured up within me 
memories of the Dorsai Worlds, of Hevflum, my planet, of the cobalt seas
beside our home in Tunisport, of the women of our family  of my grandfather,
probably dead by now. What I thought about them, I don't know. I only know
that I
did think of them, one after the other, like a man counting over his
possessions.
I roused myself at last, to become conscious of the robot beside me. We were
almost at the parking-area, and I could make out my waiting taxi, parked off
to one side in the shadows.
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"Adam, come here," I ordered
"Over there," I directed the robot.
"Yes, sir," he said.
He turned the ground car a trifle in that direction, and we rolled up beside
the taxi. He got out, went around to open the door on my side of the car, and
let me out. I stepped from floor cushion to the glassy surface of the area and
looked at the tall, black metal body of the robot, a full head above me in
height.
"Adam . . ." I said.
"Sir?"
But I found I had no words for what seemed to be inside me.
"Nothing," I said.
I stepped up to the entrance of the taxi, closed the door behind me, and moved
forward, into the pilot's seat. Out through the window beside me, I
could see Adam standing silently, his head now at last a little below mine. I
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started the engine, then, on sudden impulse, throttled back to idling-power
and set the window down. I leaned out of it.
"Adam, come here," I ordered.
The robot took two steps forward, so that he was standing just below the
window.
"When you get back to Mr. Wellman," I said, "give him the following message
from me. Say that  that. . ."
But it was no use. There was still nothing for me to say. I wanted, with a
strange desperation, to send some word to Jonas Wellman, to prove to him that
he was not alone in the world, that his love had not failed in its task of
creation as we both knew it had. But what could I say in the face of the
facts?
"Never mind.
Cancel!
" I said angrily, and turned away, reaching for the throttle. But, just as my
hand touched it, the robot's voice drew me back to the window.
"Commandant," it said.
I turned and looked out. The robot had taken a step nearer, and, as I
looked, his head swiveled back on its smooth bearings, his face raised to
mine. I remember the twin dull gleam of his red eye-lens scanners coming up to
me in the shadowy dimness, like two embers in a fire uncovered by a
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"Adam, come here," I ordered breath and glowing into sudden life.
"Rest easy, Commandant," he said. "I love him."
CONTENTS
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