m a p s " v o l u m e X I I n u m b e r 1 " s e x , s p i r i t , a n d p s y c h e d e l i c s 2 0 0 2 9
How Psychedelics Informed My Sex Life and Sex Work
by Annie Sprinkle
Few things feel better than coast to Panama s beautiful tropical beaches
getting high and getting laid. and stay overnight in beach huts. Those
David Jay Brown, author of spectacular beaches became the laboratories
The ABC s of Erotic Alchemy, for our innocent drug experiments.
Hustler Magazine, April 2000 All kinds of inebriants were available;
opium, speed, Panama Red Cannabis,
Just say KNOW. mescaline, cocaine, magic mushrooms, LSD,
Timothy Leary etc. One evening a friend, also fourteen years
old, offered me a hit of blotter acid, to
expand my mind. There were no instruc-
to speak at the tions, no warnings, and no rituals. I tripped
I was invited
AllChemical Arts Conference a week-long my brains out all night long. Totally unpre-
Annie Sprinkle is the prostitute/
event about entheogens and creativity, to be pared for lysergic acid diethylamide, my
porn star turned performance
held in a resort hotel in Hawai i in 1999. I teenage fears became magnified a thousand-
artist/sex guru. She tours with a
was surprised to be invited, because I had fold; the beach crawled with snakes, people
one-woman theater show about
not been a particularly outspoken advocate morphed into previously unknown life
her life in pornography. Her most
for these substances. Being a sex worker (call forms, my heart beat out of its chest, my eyes
recent book is Hardcore from the
girl/porn actress and director), who often bulged out of my head. I did not surrender,
Heart: The Pleasures, Profits and
did interviews with the media especially but endured, and could not wait until it was
Politics of Sex in Performance
as I evolved into a controversial performance over.
(Continuum Press). She is working
artist and sex educator I was routinely Rough as the night was, the next day I
on a new book with David Jay
trying to debunk the myth that all sex was a wiser person. I had experienced
Brown on sex and psychedelics
workers were hopeless drug addicts. Fortu- alternate realities, new dimensions, other
(interested publishers please
nately, I have never been a drug addict, but ways of seeing and feeling. I discovered that
contact her about it at
indeed I have tried most every popular drug life was not necessarily as it appeared. I
sprinkle@gatesofheck.com).
at least three times. learned that I had the power to radically
Recently she received a Doctorate
I was curious about what a conference change my consciousness, and hence the
of Human Sexuality at the
dedicated to entheogens might be like, and world around me. This was excellent
Institute for Advanced Study of
curious about the people who would attend information to have on my way to becoming
Human Sexuality, in San Francisco.
such a conference, so I accepted the invita- an adult a sexual adult.
A version of this essay was
prepared for her studies. For more tion to speak. It was as I was preparing my During subsequent beach weekends I
about Annie visit her web page at presentation for the illuminati of the took more LSD trips, usually with a sense of
www.gatesofheck.com/annie.
psychedelic world that I realized what a dread and imagined peer pressure, mixed
profound, and positive impact my psyche- with curiosity. I remember watching water
delic experiences had had on my life, and in boil for hours, seeing wallpaper patterns
particular, on my sex life. In an aha! mo- becoming kaleidoscopes, and finding God in
ment, it became clear that psychedelics had the eyes of a cat. Mostly I felt paranoid and
been perhaps my greatest sex educator. excruciatingly insecure, but there were
moments where I experienced great bliss
LSD and yummy sensations. My perceptions
When I was fourteen (a full three years
were heightened, I felt electric, got all tingly,
before I was to lose my virginity), I had my
and was awed by life. My first experiences
first psychedelic drug experience. I went to
with altered states came not from having
high school in Panama City, Panama in the
sex, but through psychedelics.
60s. My father, and most of my friends
fathers, worked with the American Embassy. MESCALINE
We were good, responsible teenagers, so on At sixteen, I finally had my first real
the weekends our parents let us go up the sexual experience. On that same night, I also
10 m a p s " v o l u m e X I I n u m b e r 1 " s e x , s p i r i t , a n d p s y c h e d e l i c s 2 0 0 2
had my first mescaline experience. My boyfriend Van was ceremonies of different cultures, such as fertility festivals, rites of
twenty-six. He owned a hippie coffee shop. He was kind, passage, ancient temple prostitution, or scenes of phallic worship.
adoring, and wise. We rode his motorcycle to his beach house Experiences of this kind frequently convey very specific and detailed,
for the weekend. He offered me a hit of mescaline. We each historically or anthropologically correct information that was not
took one. I half expected him to turn into a three-headed previously available to the subject. 2 When I started working in
monster at any moment like with LSD, but the mescaline was prostitution, I felt a strong connection to a long lineage of
more gentle and more sensuous than acid. We walked on the whores and sexual healers before me. Perhaps this connec-
beach, hand in hand, and it was a magical experience. I d tion was inspired by my psychedelic journeys.
never seen so many stars in the sky; the ocean waves and
sand were filled with phosphorescent algae. PEYOTE
The world was covered in multi-colored Every time I was about to ingest a
glitter. Van kissed me and I couldn t tell psychoactive substance, I was hesitant and
where my body started or ended next to his. I Although I did have scared, but something told me there was an
felt big love. important experience to be had, and some
some wonderful
After a romantic and transcendental key information to be gained, so I pushed
evening on the beach, we went back to his myself. It was an opportunity to peek
orgasms on Ecstasy,
place and he treated me to my first cunnilin- behind The Veil to go beyond everyday
gus experience. Perhaps it was just timing, reality and connect with the Universe in
the experience of Ecstasy
deep and intimate ways. A psychedelic
but the mescaline was definitely an aphrodi-
siac. I felt so open, aroused, and trusting. substance was never once something I
was not so much about
desired to do, but something I felt I had to
Each touch was amazing. It was the most
ecstatic experience I had ever had. A few do for personal growth.
orgasm or sex, as it was
weeks later, when I turned seventeen, I In the Arizona desert I ate peyote
(Lophophora williamsii) buttons, a plant
happily got rid of my virginity with Van. I
about looking deeply
source of mescaline. People warned me
was expecting intercourse to feel as over-
whelming and transcendental as a psyche- that it was poisonous for the body and
into my Self heart,
delic experience. Nice as it was, it didn t feel would likely make me vomit it did. I ate
that way, although later in life it would. the buttons about half a dozen times. One
soul, and psyche.
At eighteen, I was living a hippie night I had a remarkable erotic experience.
lifestyle in Tucson, Arizona. I did more I made love with the Earth and the Sky in
an energetic and emotional way as I
mescaline, more LSD, and became wildly
sexually adventurous. In a famous Playboy magazine inter- meditated and masturbated ( medibated ) under the stars. I
view in 1966, Timothy Leary exclaimed that LSD was the became acutely aware of the sensuality of the desert, of every
most powerful aphrodisiac ever discovered.1 I don t remem- grain of sand, of the wind, and the plants. It was super erotic,
ber having much, if any, sex while tripping on acid. I did not immensely satisfying, and oh so cosmic! After that experi-
find LSD conducive to wanting to be intimate or to be ence, I expanded my concept of what sex was. It was not
simply about bodies coming together for physical sex, but
touched, although I ve talked with plenty of people who have
had mind-blowing sex on LSD. However in retrospect, I see about circulating sexual energy, which was everywhere and
that my drug experiences did free me up from following available just for the asking. I could tap into it just by tuning
convention. When most of my schoolmates went on to in and saying yes. I realized that everything was sexual/
college, I ended up working in a massage parlor. To sensual that even all my little cells were all having sex. Sex
everyone s surprise, especially my own, I found my calling! I was both microscopic and enormous.
was already breaking laws by smoking pot and taking
OTHER DRUGS
psychedelics (which I felt should be legal), so to do illegal
At twenty-six I was living in Manhattan. I became
prostitution was not that much of a stretch. I believed
interested in exploring my shadow side, Dark Eros, the
prostitution should be legal also, and became involved in the
worlds of S/M, extreme fetish, dominance/submission. By
prostitutes rights movement. I enjoyed my work and it fit
day I worked in an S/M house as a professional dominatrix/
my needs at the time.
submissive. By night I frequented the Hellfire Club, a
Before LSD became illegal, Dr. Stanislav Grof practiced
veritable smorgasbord of kinky sex. I experimented with
psychotherapy with his patients while they were on LSD,
some of the non-psychedelic drugs; crack, angel dust, heroin,
often with very successful results. Sexual issues would
etc. I was never a lover of drugs, but I honestly felt it was my
sometimes come up, often in surprising ways. In his book,
duty as a sex researcher and pleasure artist to try them. I
LSD Psychotherapy, he wrote that: Occasionally LSD subjects
had visited the Temple of Delphi and the brothels of Pompeii.
experienced themselves as participants in complex sexual rituals and
m a p s " v o l u m e X I I n u m b e r 1 " s e x , s p i r i t , a n d p s y c h e d e l i c s 2 0 0 2 11
I read that throughout history prostitutes utilized various express my anger. I practiced, and sure enough, I learned to
aphrodisiacs and opiates with their clients. In my experience, have long, extended orgasms. When I then produced and
these drugs were in a different category than the directed my own video, The Sluts and Goddesses Video Work-
psychedelics. Although I did have some very interesting shop (1992), I captured myself having an extremely intense
sexual adventures with these substances, there was not a five-minute-long orgasm. In retrospect I realize that I used a
sense of deep exploration of my soul and psyche. I had a sense lot of psychedelic imagery in the video. The project was quite
of getting high and tuning out, as opposed to going deeper successful.
and tuning in. I also saw firsthand how incredibly destruc- Although I did have some wonderful orgasms on Ecstasy,
tive particular drugs could be when some of my friends the experience of Ecstasy was not so much about orgasm or
became heavily addicted to them. I never met anyone sex, as it was about looking deeply into my Self heart, soul,
addicted to entheogens. and psyche. Each time I took Ecstasy I retained some key
piece of information that I could utilize to grow as a person,
MDMA / ECSTASY and expand my (sexual) horizons. I found the lover I had
By the mid- 80s the Great Dying was well underway;
been searching for so long me! When I took it with lovers, I
AIDS had taken its huge toll on my community. I d lost many
could feel a sense of empathy with my lover without doing
friends and lovers, and was trying to cope. Being a very
anything. I experienced my body as a temple, and sex as
sexually active gal, I was desperately searching for new,
prayer. Ecstasy took me into my heart the way that
satisfying forms of sexuality, which could be enjoyed without
psychedelics took me into my mind and spirit. Also when on
exchanging bodily fluids. I signed up for a three-day Sacred
Ecstasy I would sometimes have wonderful, long crygasms.
Sex workshop led by a Tantra teacher named Jwala. At the
Ecstasy showed me a deeper kind of love, which I was inspired
workshop, my workshop partner gave me my first hit of
to create more of in my life, without the drug. And I did.
Ecstasy, and that s exactly what I experienced ecstasy. It s
A lover of mine who had studied Tantra in India for
no wonder E is extremely popular in the sex community.
several years, told me that with Ecstasy a person could get to
Before MDMA became illegal it had been used successfully
similar ecstatic and spiritual places that took Tantra yogis a
during marriage/relationship counseling sessions. Therapists
lifetime of strict disciplines to get to if they were lucky
found that partners were better able to communicate with
enough to ever get to those states. There is of course a down
each other while on MDMA. It reduces performance anxiety
side to Ecstasy. I had some miserable hangovers. I slept with
to zero and creates a yummy, lovey-dovey feeling, and a nice
my best friend s husband when I shouldn t have. Oops. Some
shift in consciousness. Needless to say, I became a convert
folks let down their guard and have risky, unsafe sex, and I m
to Tantra, and to Ecstasy.
told that a few people have had medical emergencies with
I continued to take Ecstasy, once, twice, or three times a
extremely serious consequences.
year. Jwala taught me about how to do ritual, about prepar-
In 1993, I was at my sexual peak. I was an orgasm on
ing the space, and stating one s intention before making
two legs. My sexual energy flowed like bubbly pink cham-
love. I used those same techniques when I would ingest a
pagne throughout my body on a daily basis. I studied and
substance, which really helped make the experiences more
practiced Tantra relatively seriously, and all my chakras were
satisfying. I mostly preferred taking Ecstasy alone. I used it as
spinning like pinwheels in a strong wind. Around this time I
a tool for self-evaluation. Usually I would spend some time
started facilitating sexuality workshops for women. The main
making love with myself and doing sexual healing on
thing I taught was the Taoist Erotic Massage Rituals (created
myself. The first time I did E alone, I fell deeply in love with
by Joseph Kramer of the Body Electric School in Oakland),
myself for the first time, which was very good for me as I had
consisting of intensive genital massage strokes combined
a relatively low self-image. This helped me transition out of
with lots of rhythmic breathing. It was powerful and effec-
working in prostitution and appearing in mainstream porn
tive stuff! Because of my drug experiences I was prepared to
films, and into doing more of the kind of work I wanted to do
handle the very high erotic vibratory states that these
at that point. I also found myself desiring to connect with
techniques propelled our groups into. Sometimes there were
women, both sexually and in my work. I started making
very intense emotions and moments of distress. I was
feminist porn. The second time I did Ecstasy, I heard a voice
comfortable and experienced enough to manage these
tell me to quit smoking tobacco, which I then did perma-
transcendental states because of my experiences with drugs.
nently, after 25 years of a heavy smoking habit. Another
I learned how to take women (and sometimes men) on
time, I sat naked in front of my mirror and looked at my
pseudo-psychedelic journeys without drugs!
repressed anger, and let it surface. I hissed like a snake for
several hours, and witnessed my inner Medusa in a remark- KETAMINE
ably non-judgmental and fearless way. I realized how sexual I first heard about ketamine when I went to Hawai i to
energy and anger are connected. I realized that in order to go visit friends, and to attend the 80th birthday party of Dr.
to the next level of my sexuality I needed to learn to better John C. Lilly, the infamous psychobiologist, dolphin re-
12 m a p s " v o l u m e X I I n u m b e r 1 " s e x , s p i r i t , a n d p s y c h e d e l i c s 2 0 0 2
searcher, and psychedelic enthusiast (who recently passed mushrooms. I wondered if people who have never done any
away). If Dr. Lilly found ketamine so enlightening, I figured psychedelics could ever feel the same way, or if our psyche-
it must be worth trying. My friend injected my buttock with delic experiences enabled us to enhance and intensify the
a carefully measured dose of Special K. I slipped right into magical feelings of love.
the deepest trance I d ever been in. I could not (or did not At one point I purposely didn t ingest any drugs for
want to) walk, talk, sit up or do anything, but I was intensely about six years because I came to feel that drugs were the lazy
aware of Self. I lay on the bed with my eyes closed. It was person s sex. Why do drugs when one could accomplish the
extremely visual. Projected on my eyelids were quickly same things from having several hours of sex, and not have
moving three-dimensional fractal-like patterns, one after the any hangover the next day? (This does not work with
other. I had multiple eyegasms! At the same time I experi- quickies.) Many people are too lazy, or don t have the sexual
enced absolute, total, inner peace, which was something I skills to get there. Or they have a limited capacity for sex and
was hankering for after years of living in bustling Manhattan pleasure. With a substance there s no escaping the intensity,
and jet-setting around the world. It felt exquisite; like being and the intoxication. With sex you have to work at it, but in
in that delicious post-orgasm afterglow state, but for a couple the long run it s probably better for your health. Then again,
of hours. variety is the spice of life.
When I came out of the ketamine experience, I brought
with me an overwhelming desire to create a more peaceful AYAHUASCA
life for myself. I moved out of New York City where I had Although I have had a number of opportunities, I have
not yet tried the plant brew, ayahuasca. I did however try
lived for twenty-four years, and I have lived by the sea ever
pharmahuasca (the synthetic version) with a group of
since. I learned that one way to experience peace and bliss
about a dozen friends. We were led by an experienced guide
was to not do, but to be. My sexuality changed yet again. It
became less performative, less active, less energetic. Sex and his excellent and caring assistants. We prepared for a
couple of days with fasting and enemas, then took the
became deeper, slower, and subtler I call it Zen sex. With
pharmahuasca along with a fairly heavy dose of mushrooms.
my newfound understanding of how less could be more,
Our guide said the mushrooms helped make the
I did something totally wild and experimental: I committed
to a serious, monogamous relationship! pharmahuasca more visual.
When I took off it was like I had an entire New Age
PSILOCYBIAN MUSHROOMS greeting card shop behind my eyelids. It was the longest,
Mostly I have used psilocybian mushrooms with lovers most intense, most hallucinatory, most physical of all
that I was in a close relationship with. These trips have journeys I d ever been on. It lasted about ten hours, with
ranged from very mild to intense, depending on the freshness several hours more coming down. I lay still the whole time
of the mushrooms and the dosage. Usually while on mush- with my eyes closed; except when I rolled over to purge into
rooms I have not found myself wanting to make love in the a bowl, something everyone in the group did repeatedly (a
traditional sense, especially when I m peaking. Instead I wonderfully kinky and intimate group experience). This
usually prefer having physical space. However, I find it very substance affects the nervous system quite strongly, so I had
bonding and very intimate to share such an intense and lots of sweats and chills, and other very strange physical
personal experience with a lover. I would sometimes get sensations, like a snake made of air whipping around my
insights into our relationship, which we could talk about body.
afterwards. I ve found that mushrooms (as well as the other At the time of this journey, my father was dying of
substances mentioned in this story) can definitely deepen a cancer, so my journey was a lot about pain, fear, and death. I
relationship, in a remarkably similar way that sex does. saw the complexity of the Universe as a huge, fast, mega-
Coming off mushrooms is an ideal time to do some sensual machine. I saw clowns, gargoyles, Goddesses, and Virgin
massage or some serious cuddling. There is a delicious Marys. I saw bloodshed in Rwanda, Jon-Benet Ramsey being
unification with my partner an openness and vulnerability. murdered, and I saw myself being stabbed to death by a serial
My present girlfriend, Barbara, has done well over a killer. I saw my father in the hospital on a respirator strug-
thousand psychedelic journeys. She was even a guinea pig gling to stay alive. I saw all these things without any judge-
at Stanford University when they were studying the effects ments. There was no good or bad. Everything worked
of heavy doses of LSD in the 70s. One beautiful summer day, together, like yin with yang. I became acutely aware of the
we were on a mountain lake in her rowboat, and we found human condition. I saw compassion as the best salvation
ourselves tripping without having ingested a thing. Our for myself and all people and things. Lots of thoughts and
psychedelic door flew open probably because we had feelings came up about my body, and about the aging process.
ventured through it many times before. Our love was the Sometimes I felt strong, healthy, and light; other times I felt
drug, and it was strong! Our senses became heightened, time old, fat, and polluted. I believed that the ayahuasca was
warped, colors were brighter. It felt exactly like we were on helping to prepare me for my death.
m a p s " v o l u m e X I I n u m b e r 1 " s e x , s p i r i t , a n d p s y c h e d e l i c s 2 0 0 2 13
In the months that followed, sex became more about soul So if psychedelics have the potential to be so beneficial,
merging, loving support, and nurturing and comforting each why did they get such a bad rap? Perhaps for some of the
other before we die. It became more serious than before. It same reasons that sex gets a bad rap. Terence McKenna
felt like I had achieved a level of sexual maturity, and at the offered an explanation for why drugs and sex get suppressed
same time I grieved for my youthful enthusiasm and naïveté. and why just say no doesn t work:
This journey inspired me to make a sex film called Teenage Sexuality is the glory of the living experience. Ecstasy is the
Mermaid Fanta-sea. I play an elder mermaid who initiates a contemplation of wholeness. That s why when you experience
young mermaid into the treasures of her sexuality. I teach the ecstasy when you contemplate wholeness you come down
young mermaid how to seduce a diver, and then in the end I remade in terms of the political and social arena because you have
die an orgasmic death. seen the larger picture. 4
People tend to link sex and drugs because both are
SEX AND PSYCHEDELICS condemned by society. Nevertheless, throughout the ages
Clearly my experiences with psychedelics have been
human beings have continually searched for more ecstasy,
educational and beneficial with regard to my own more sexual satisfaction, for solutions to their sexual
sexuality and my life s work. From my observa- problems, and for aphrodisiacs. Psychoactive sub-
tions, these psychoactive drugs have not been stances have been used in most cultures because
At
harmful in any way for me, or for the people they can be keys to unlock the mysteries of life. Of
I know who have used them. Terence course as each mystery is unraveled, a bunch of
one point
McKenna pointed out that:
new ones appear. Both sex and psychedelics are
The profundity of [hallucinogenic ultimately about consciousness, about self
I purposely
inebriation] and its potential for a positive discovery, and going beyond everyday reality to
didn t ingest
feedback into the process of reorganizing that magical place somewhere over the
the personality should have long ago rainbow, where we feel Divine and we experi-
any drugs for about
made psychedelics an indispensable tool ence some truth. Granted, both sex and
six years because
for psychotherapy. 3
psychedelic drugs are generally used uncon-
And I might add, a tool for sex therapy.
sciously by most people.5 We need to work on
I came to feel that
Oddly enough, I have not found a whole that.
lot written about psychedelics in relation Needless to say, the AllChemical Arts
drugs were the
to sex, when to me they seem so totally Conference in Hawai i was absolutely wonder-
lazy person s
interconnected. ful, and so were all the people who attended it. I
From what I have gathered, psychedelics
had a fantastic time and learned a whole lot. Since
sex.
are generally not used much as aphrodisiacs that conference I decided to support more research
for sexual arousal although people do report into these drugs, support law reform, and come out
having phantastasmagorical sexual experiences on as an advocate for the safe use of psychedelics
them. More often the user gains some key informa- especially with regard to sex research and sex educa-
tion, has a new experience, or sees her/himself from a tion. I m hoping someone will soon have the courage to
new perspective, and any of this can greatly inform that
organize a conference on sex and psychedelics. I ll be there
person s sexual life. Just as each sexual experience can with bells on! "
potentially teach us something about sex, each drug experi-
ence can potentially teach us something about sex. And for
that matter, sexual experiences can potentially teach us
something about how to take drug trips more effectively. As I
became more sexually experienced, I became much better at
handling my psychedelic journeys. I learned how to not have REFERENCES
1) Leary, T. 1966. Playboy interview: Timothy Leary, Playboy 13(9): 93 et seq.
expectations, and how to surrender.
2) Grof, S. 1980. LSD Psychotherapy, first edition. Hunter House.
The Drug Workshop (www.drugworkshop.net), a web
3) McKenna, T. 1992. Food of the Gods: The Search for the Original Tree of Knowledge; A Radical
site with sensible information regarding drug use, says: Sex
History of Plants, Drugs, and Human Evolution. Bantam Books.
is a drug! The biological chemistry of sex is a lot like that of
4) McKenna, T. 1991. The Archaic Revival. Harper Collins.
psychoactive drugs. So when you have sex on drugs, you are having
5) Pointed out over dinner by Christina Saint Laurent.
sex with that drug. Interesting concept, to have sex with the
drug (or plant) itself. The site also stresses the importance of
whom you decide to do your drugs with. I couldn t agree
more. Set and setting are so important. Journeying with one
or more experienced guide(s) is generally the best way to go.
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